Many tweens are obsessed with skincare and are inundated on social media with videos of makeup hauls and other preteens’ “get ready with me” routines.
A child and adolescent psychiatrist warns that while the trend has some benefits, it could lead to trouble.
“Starting early with caring for yourself, being concerned with your skin, doing all the things that you need to do to maintain a healthy body, mind and spirit are all very positive,” said Dr. Asha Patton-Smith of Kaiser Permanente. “The challenge is how much time is being spent on this, what the goal is and when it doesn’t seem to be working well or seems to be obsessive or excessive.”
Patton-Smith said it’s important for families to remember that preteens are still developing their own self-concept and self-esteem.
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“Developmentally, there is some kind of unsurety or insecurity in that space,” she said.
Nearly two-thirds of parents say their child is insecure about some aspect of their appearance, a recent poll by C.S. Mott Children’s Hospital at University of Michigan Health found. One in five said their teens avoid scenarios such as being in photos because they’re too self-conscious. The poll also found that adolescents were more worried about their skin and acne than about their weight.
A child psychiatrist shares advice for families on the tween skincare trend
For families with children who are interested in skincare and beauty products, Patton-Smith offered some advice.
Try to listen non-judgmentally: Be an “active, supportive, non-judgmental listener.”
Educate kids about what they see online: Teach kids to be critical of what they see. Talk about the filters used on Instagram, “the fact that everyone’s not perfect” and how reality may be different than it seems online.
Set a good example: Be careful about what you say about your own appearance or the appearances of others. “You can show them more than you can tell them. If you’re making comments about your body or other bodies or people that you see on TV or social media, that’s negative. Kids hear that and can be affected by that.”
Talk about “the why”: Try to have an open conversation with your kids about why they want a product. “If it seems that, hey, you know, ‘My friend got this product and says it's amazing and their skin feels great,’ OK, fine. Within moderation, within a price range that makes sense.”
Teach acceptance: Teach kids that products can feel nice or help enhance you, but “it’s not to change you, because we love you the way [you] are.”
Keep an eye out for any changes in behavior: It’s normal for young people to have some insecurities. But families should look for any changes in their child’s behavior, such as:
- saying negative things about themselves
- appearing to be more socially isolated
- appearing to be so obsessed with a certain thing that it interferes with daily life
If you’re concerned, seek help from a pediatrician or mental health provider.
